Interview with David Wells

As the 2009 baseball campaign nears, we’ll be thumbing through the phone book to call average Joes with famous Yankee names to see how their lives have been altered as a result of their name. Our first call is with David Wells of New York.

Name: David Wells
Hometown: New York, NY
Occupation: Graphic Designer
Age: 33

The Max: First things first, are you a Yankees fan?
David Wells: I am. But to be honest, I wasn’t really much of a baseball fan until the mid-to-late 1990s. Once David Wells the pitcher came to New York, it became hard for me not to be attracted to what he was doing. All my friends used to call me and tell me what a great game I had the other night. They were obviously referring to Wells the Yankee, not me. But it was fun. So I started to follow his career and the Yankees. Now, I’m a huge Yankees fan.

The Max: Judging from your photo, it looks like you live a bit of a healthier lifestyle than David Wells the pitcher.
Wells: Yeah, I probably take in a fraction of the fat grams that he does in a given day… I’m guessing he eats more cheeseburgers than I do. Plus, I’m more of an Amstel Light kind of guy. I take Wells for more of a Budweiser guy. He probably doesn’t care much about calorie count.

The Max: David Wells the pitcher once claimed to pitch a perfect game drunk. He later backed off his comment and said he was simply hungover. But we prefer to think he was a bit inebriated… why let the facts get in the way of a good story? Have you ever accomplished greatness at your job while under the influence?
Wells: No, no, no… To be honest, I rarely accomplish greatness as it is. Being inebriated would make it even harder. But I have seen people around me do it. After all, I am a graphic designer. By nature, we’re always a little “influenced.” For whatever reason, though, I’m not like most designers. I save my good times for after 5 o’clock.

The Max: The former Yankees pitcher recently said he would punch Joe Torre if he saw him again. Would you punch Torre if you ever saw him?
Wells: Ha! Umm, probably not. But I am a little upset with him. I can’t figure out why he would write that book, especially now. It seems like he had nothing to gain by writing it. In my opinion, he broke an unwritten clubhouse code. Looks like “Joe Torre Day” at the Stadium will have to wait now.

The Max: Have you ever used your famous name to your advantage?
Wells: I haven’t, but people often think I am lying when I tell them my name. It doesn’t happen so much any more, but when Boomer was with the Yanks, girls always thought I was giving them a fake name when I went up to them at bars. I actually had to start using a fake name so that girls wouldn’t think I was using a fake name… no kidding.

The Max: What name would you use?
Wells: Oh, I forget. It didn’t happen that much because you don’t really have to give a girl your last name when meeting them. But in the rare occasion that it did happen, I just blurted whatever came to mind… it was probably Smith or something like that.

The Max: Ok, that answer was boring. Next time we give you permission to lie to us too, just so that we have something a little more interesting to print than “Smith.”
Wells: You got it.

The Max: True or false, you own one of those navy blue Yankees T-shirts with Wells’ name and number on the back.
Wells: True, I actually own a few.

The Max: True or false, you want to grow a David Wells mustache?
Wells: False

The Max: True or false, you are growing annoyed by the current line of questioning?
Wells: Very true.

The Max: Last question – True or false, you have a David Wells poster up in your bedroom.
Wells: False, but I do have a photo from a magazine up in my cube at work.

The Max: You do know that it’s a little dorky that you actually admitted this, don’t you?
Wells: I suppose.

Tags: David Wells