Tag Archives: football

Phony Texas Tech ticket confiscated

3 Nov

Desperately seeking admission into a sold-out event sometimes causes people, The Max included, to purchase tickets from strangers at the venue who have somehow come across an abundance. There’s a high risk of being ripped off… and that’s exactly what happened on Nov. 2 in Lubbock, Texas.

About 500 fans that thought they’d be permitted to enter the stadium to watch the Texas-Texas Tech game were surprised when they were refused entry for possessing counterfeit tickets. After forking over about 200 bucks for what turned out to be worthless pieces of paper, the guys and gals who got scammed were outraged. And so was The Max … until we actually looked at one of the phony tickets. Then we reversed our decision and felt it was the buyers’ fault. You be the judge:

texasticket.jpg

Drop us a line: themax_blog@ymail.com

Steelers settle for fifth choice long snapper

1 Nov

Looks like the Pittsburgh Steelers have hired Jared
Retkofsky
, a guy who used to lift sofas for a living, as their new long snapper following an
incident against the Giants last week where fill-in snapper James Harrison launched a snap so far over the punter’s head that the ball may still be
in orbit.

What people don’t know, and maybe even something Retkofsky doesn’t know, is that he was actually the Steelers’ fifth choice for the job. The other potential candidates for the position had various reasons for declining — the strangest being the inability to work because he was on the lam for theft.

In addition to the professional burglar, a mayor, a cop and a clown were all offered the job before Jared the Mover. It sounds confusing, we know, so we made a diagram to clear it all up:

steelerstimeline.jpg
Representatives from McDonaldland, where Mayor McCheese, Officer Big Mac, the Hamburglar and Ronald McDonald all reside, have not returned calls or emails from The Max.

However, Grimace did have this to say:

grimace3.jpg

C’mon…email us: themax_blog@ymail.com

Best Halloween costume ensemble on Earth

31 Oct

Awwwwww, look at how cute these guys are pretending to be a real NFL football team. That’s precious.

bengals.jpgReal conversation I had with someone in Cincinnati this year:

Me: So, tell me how it feels to cheer for a team that has the NFL’s worst record?

Cincy native: We still have a team?

Email us: themax_blog@ymail.com

Why Carson Palmers agent was fired

22 Oct

Bad Endorsements Palmer.jpgTwo questions: Who wears eye black and dresses their sausage links with mustard to look like the laces of a football? Cincinnati Bengals quarterback Carson Palmer, that’s who. You have a problem with that? Take a look at the fierceness glaring at you in that photo and you might want to rethink your position. Go on, look at him in all his meanness. He’d crush you like he crushes his John Morrell sausages.  

But all kidding aside, besides looking as tough as Prince in that pic, there’s something else about this — the slogan: “GO Long…er!” It’s an awful play on words, just dreadful in an editorial and creative sense. If you ask us, Palmer and his reps certainly fumbled the snap when choosing to endorse this product.
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