Tag Archives: NFL

NBC opts to lose credibility

6 Jan

If you thought NBC’s 18-man NFL studio show was tough to watch up to this point, just wait ’til you get a load of this. Turns out former Lions President and CEO Matt Millen has been added to the panel. Yeah, the same Matt Millen that put together the 0-16 Detroit squad (what’s next? Ryan Leaf analyzing the league’s quarterbacks?). Apparently, providing expert opinions from credible football sources is not a priority for them. But hey, at least Millen knows he stinks:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/22425001/vp/28484964#28484964.msnbcLinks {font-size:11px; font-family:Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; color: #999; margin-top: 5px; background: transparent; text-align: center; width: 425px;} .msnbcLinks a {text-decoration:none !important; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999 !important; font-weight:normal !important; height: 13px;} .msnbcLinks a:link, .msnbcLinks a:visited {color: #5799db !important;} .msnbcLinks a:hover, .msnbcLinks a:active {color:#CC0000 !important;}

Nobody needs to worry about Rod Marinelli

29 Dec

rodmarinellibiggestloser.jpgLike the Jets’ Eric Mangini and the Browns’ Romeo Crennel, Lions coach Rod Marinelli got a pink slip tacked onto his office door as a bleated holiday gift after one measly 0-16 season.  We get ousting Mangini. We also get axing Crennel. But Marinelli? Man, this one was out of the blue. This is the season for giving and all, but we didn’t think that meant giving a perfectly halfway-decent coach a one-way ticket to the NFL’s unemployment line. 


True story: When the news broke about Marinelli, someone here at The Max shed a few tears (my brother, Jack). But all fears — and tears — were set aside when we came across this ad for Nogaine and realized that the ex-coach found himself another job…


rodnogaine.jpg
What is Nogaine? Good question. It’s a product that serves as the opposite of Rogaine — it helps hair fall out quicker. And who better to hawk a product that promotes losing than the biggest loser in NFL history, Rod Marinelli!

Favre to retire?

26 Dec
brettf.jpg

Before the Jets even take the field for their final regualr season game this Sunday, the New York media has already began to speculate if Brett Favre will retire (again) after the game. 

At the risk of sounding naive, The Max actually thought the legendary QB already hung up his cleats. After all, there is no way an active NFL quarterback could record the following numbers and still have his job, is there? Here’s a look at his unimpressive December:

Brett Favre G Att Comp Pct Yds Avg Lng TD Int 1st 1st% 20+ Sck SckY Rate
December 3 92 55 59.8 531 5.8 30 1 5 26 28.3 9 7 51 56.9

Want to see how badly The Maxs Rob Parker interview could have gone?

23 Dec
By calling The Max, Rob Parker did more than highlight some of our shortcomings (insert an inappropriate joke here), he had us ponder just how badly that interview could have spun out of control had he held a different temperament, like, say, that of a professional athlete. 
There have been some bad interviews conducted in the past, and here at The Max we usually like to refer to those as our job interviews. But for the poor sports interviews, there’s YouTube, which provides hours of enjoyment by catching lots and lots of screwed up interviews on video for everyone’s viewing pleasure.
Editor’s Note: If you watch one video, please let it be the second or third video down. If you watch two, why don’t you just watch all four?
Here is a 3 minute rundown of bad interview endings. The video is good, trust us.



This is an 11-second interview with a Halloween joke that goes terribly wrong…
http://video.google.com/googleplayer.swf?docid=-4806937880659756938&hl=en&fs=true



Um…what’d he say? Seriously, can anyone translate this 13-second interview:


Here is former WWE Superstar (or ‘rassler) Lex Lugar botching a promo for some no-name wrestling organization. (Runtime: 1:12)

Rob Parker continues insulting spree

22 Dec

robparker.jpgLess than 24 hours after insulting Detroit Lions head coach Rod Marinelli by asking if he wished his daughter had married “a better defensive coordinator,” Detroit News’ Rob Parker continued his spree of insulting remarks when he called The Max’s world headquarters in Dix Hills, New York.

After getting me (Jeff Maxwell) on the phone, Parker was so bold as to ask if I wished my mother gave birth to a better sports blogger, referring to my brother Jack’s lousy posts of late. Much to Parker’s surprise, though, I answered “yes.” I mean come on, Jack’s posts are totally holding The Max back. Just check out some of his not-so-greatest hits:

  • Post: The Yanks are tightening their wallet. Comment: So just because CC is wearing a construction helmet, it means he is building the stadium? I guess the joke was the part about the fryer. Not so good, bro. You’re better than that.
  • Post: Royals sign young righty. Comment: Hey, Jack. Every single web site in the world made that joke. The only difference is that yours was made about 24 hours after theirs. This isn’t a newspaper; you gotta post those things faster.
  • Post: Fake athlete names. Comment: Who does a Top 8 list? Don’t people either do Top 10 or Top 5… you know, a nice round number?
  • Post: Notre Dame cheerleaders. Comment: I see where he was going here… He just wanted to show the pretty girls. Too bad Notre Dame doesn’t have any, though. Ouch!
  • Post: Baseball awards. Comment: The CTRL + Z Award? Really? I’d like to hit CTRL + Z on asking him to be a part of this blog.
  • Post: Dumbest sports team names. Comment: At least this time he rounded it out to 10 items. Way to spend the extra two minutes to make the post worth reading.

Blagojevich sought legislation to change Bears helmets

22 Dec

Disgraced Chicago Governor Rod Blagojevich wasn’t just attempting to toss his weight around when it came to President-elect Barack Obama’s vacant Illinois Senate seat, The Max sources have found.

Aside from facing Federal Corruption charges for attempting to bully people into giving his wife a high-profile gig and forcing donors to fork over cash to his campaign, Mr. Blagojevich (pronounced Blag-oye-a-vich) also attempted to change the Bears’ appearance to look more like his own by adding a thick coat of hair onto the the Bears’ helmets. (It’s true. We swear.)

We have no excuse for the governor, except, perhaps, that the guy actually believed if the Bears wore a floppy rat’s nest on top of their helmets it’d be something fashionable. We’re not quite sure. 
What we do know, however, is that one of our reporters obtained a sketch (see below image) that confirms just how much Blag-o allowed power to go to his head. Although we must admit that we’re not quite sure how power or anything else got through his massive hair helmet to get to his head.
 

bearshelmetfinal.jpg

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