Archive | November, 2008

McNabb: Who knew?

18 Nov

dmac.jpgPhiladelphia Eagles fans have reason to be concerned this morning. After Sunday’s 13-13 tie against the listless Cincinnati Bengals, Donovan McNabb told reporters that he didn’t even know ties were an option in the NFL (full story). With that startling revelation, we decided to educate the veteran quarterback on a few other football rules that he may not be aware of:

  • Extra points, which occur after scoring a touchdown, count for one (1) point.
  • 6+1=7, also known as a touchdown plus extra point.
  • When it’s 1st and 10, your team needs 10 yards for a first down (new set of downs).
  • The team with the most points at the end of the game is declared the winner.
  • The Super Bowl is the championship game. Its intensity can cause a quarterback to choke under pressure… oh wait, he already knows that.

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Holyfield wants to fight… again

18 Nov

Evander Holyfield has announced he wants another shot at becoming the undisputed champion. No, seriously, he does.

“My goal is to be undisputed champion, not just to win one title,”
Holyfield said at a news conference Tuesday.

We’re not clairvoyant over here at The Max, but we do know that Holyfield should step back into the ring the same way Michael Jordan should come out of retirement for the trillionth time. But Holyfield is going to do what he wants, so if the 46-year-old former champ really wants to prove he’s still got what it takes, here’s the best, safest option for him:

Cozy up in front of the TV, get his old Sega Genesis out of the attic, blow the dust off of it, and play Evander Holyfield’s “Real Deal” Boxing, which is also known as the worst video game on planet Earth. If he can’t play as himself, Holyfield should use the Game Genie to get to the final round, where he’d play against himself, and then throw the fight.This way he can see himself hold up his title belt one last time and he won’t get pummeled like Apollo Creed at the beginning of Rocky IV. (Watch Apollo get smashed up by Ivan Drago to really slow, cheesy music.)

evander.jpgEmail us: themax_blog@ymail.com

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SEC: Cuban involved with insider trading

17 Nov

NEW YORK — Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban was involved with insider trading back in June 2004, the U.S. Security and Exchange Commission (SEC) announced Monday. The news about Cuban, known for his passion and inability to keep his enormous yap shut, wasn’t a shock to many people. But there was one Mavericks fan living in New York who was very vocal about the outspoken owner.

“So you’re telling me he can trade away shares of his garbage stocks, but he can’t trade away the dead weight giving the Mavs a 3-7 record?” asked Al Harrington of Dix Hills, N.Y. “Well, now it’s official. As of right this second, I’m officially a fan of the New York Knicks.”
What Harrington failed to realize was the frustrations and despair that comes along with rooting for the Knicks. After he watches his first game as a fan of New York basketball, we will follow up to see if he has decided to retract that statement.
As for Cuban, he could not be reached for comment about Harrison’s defection to the Knicks. Sources say that Cuban was busy in a closed-door meeting involving some bad stocks that are slated to tank later in the week.
mark-cuban.jpg

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Attention everyone: Andy Murray has left reality

16 Nov

We’re not sure what tennis star Andy Murray is doing in this picture, but we’ve put together two ideas:

  1. Eating an invisible apple (which looks like a Granny Smith brand).
  2. Trying to woo a potential love interest by showing how well he kisses air.

andy.jpgEmail: themax_blog@ymail.com

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Dont look now, but theres a giant man behind us

14 Nov

For years, people categorized Enzo Calzaghe’s supposed visions of a giant man as early signs of Alzheimer’s. But this photo finally grants credence to the claims of the father of boxing great Joe Calzaghe.

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An image that would make Mr. Miyagi proud

14 Nov

You’re probably looking at this picture thinking the same thing we were: Cool! It’s the final scene in 1984’s smash-hit movie, The Karate Kid! 

karatekid.jpgTo see just how close Ireland’s Liam Miller (aka Liam-son) and Brazil’s Silva Gilberto (left) were to creating a flawless rendition of the classic battle between Daniel LaRusso and Cobra Kai’s Johnny Lawrence, watch the video we’ve posted below.

Warning: Watching Daniel “The Karate Kid” LaRusso in action may cause you to leap out of your seat, perform martial arts moves on an invisible opponent and generally disrupt other people who are pretending to be busy near your workspace.

Email us: themax_blog@ymail.com

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