Since Brett Favre bothered everyone with another retirement announcement, you can do one of two things: camp outside his enormous crib like one of our writers, Jack Maxwell, has decided to do, or you can pitch some ideas to The Max and hope they somehow make it to Brett’s ear. Here’s some options we came up with for him:
Stay on Broadway
Favre is perfect for the lead in a one-act play that we’ve tentatively titled “The Lost Season of the Fallen Man.” Hopefully you’ll know what we based the plot on.
(Un)-motivational Speaker
Like SNL’s Matt Foley before him, Brett Favre has credit to his name and could get a gig talking to people about the proper way to ruin a legacy, and also why attempting to stretch a career out beyond its lifespan is an awful, terrible, no good idea. To add star power, we’ve heard that Michael Jordan will be an occasional guest speaker.
Seek solace as a caveman
Nothing personal, Brett, but having read something about you and the Jets’ downfall for the second half of the football season until the day you decided to retire (again), we kind of just want you to GO AWAY. Again, nothing personal, but please get lost and stay out of the media. (Nice Photoshop work, we know.)
Nothing personal, Brett, but having read something about you and the Jets’ downfall for the second half of the football season until the day you decided to retire (again), we kind of just want you to GO AWAY. Again, nothing personal, but please get lost and stay out of the media. (Nice Photoshop work, we know.)
The Max 