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Whos the worst of the worst?

19 Jan

cavs23mvp.jpgThe normally egotistical Kobe Bryant recently stated that he thinks LeBron James is the NBA MVP so far this season. A couple things come to mind immediately:

1. Duh.

2. We obviously agree; but more importantly, we want to know who would be crowned the NBA’s anti-Lebron James. If Lebron is THE best of the best, who is the worst of the worst? We know the LVP (Least Valuable Player) award has never been actually handed out. But that doesn’t mean that it shouldn’t be. Luckily, The Max is here to formally award the crown of LVP to one very deserving NBA “star.” But before we do that, here are some of the runners-up:

  • Eddy Curry (NY Knicks): Despite clocking only three minutes of playing time this season, Chubs is cashing a check worth more than $9.5 million. We’re not so good with the math, but we do know that’s a lot of coin per minute. Have a salad, by the way.
  • Jerome James (NY Knicks): $6.2 million this year to play in two games… that’s it, two games. Adding to his uselessness, James reportedly suffered some sort of girly injury on Sunday that will keep him out for the rest of the season. Not for nothin’, but wasn’t he out for the rest of the season anyway?
  • Danilo Gallinari (NY Knicks): Who thought drafting this piason 6th overall was a good idea? If you’re keeping score at home, he’s getting more than $2.8 million this season and he’s only played three games.

Are you seeing a pattern here? Yes, they are all members of the Knicks. And no, we are not being biased. Taking everything into account, the above three names are legitimately three of the least valuable players in the NBA.

But there can only be one LVP. And the winner is:

lvp.jpgOnly in America can you get paid more than $28 million to do absolutely nothing. Congrats, Steph.

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Report: Super Bowl commercials more hype than laughs

19 Jan

Every year around Super Bowl time someone will inevitably say this: “Man, the best part of the Super Bowl is the commercials.” 

Then after the game that same person will say: “Man, the commercials weren’t as good as they were last year.”
Before the Steelers crush the Cardinals at Super Bowl XLIII, we need to clear something up: Super Bowl commercials never live up to the hype. On average, there are about two memorable ads per year with a slew of crappy ones wasting our time in between.

GoDaddy.com ads might be the biggest offenders. They’re awful. If you don’t know which ones they are, they feature WWE Diva Candice Michelle (picture in all of her airbrushed beauty below), who looks more and more plastic as each aging year passes. We wish GoDaddy.com commercials would pull a Vince Young and just vanish.
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But the commercials are, in our humble opinion, a perennial disappointment. Simply because businesses pay top dollar ($3 million for a 30-second slot) doesn’t mean they produce — and they’re certainly not the main reason to watch the Super Bowl! 

Put it this way: how many Hollywood films cut checks with lots and lots of zeroes on the end of them that turn out to be enormous stinkers?  Here’s a few big-budget bombs that lost tons of cash: Waterworld, Battlefield Earth, Catwoman, Mystery Men, Pluto Nash, Cutthroat Island…

You get the idea. However, there are some redeeming ads, and if you have some spare time on your hands, check out some of the funnier ones on YouTube courtesy of superbowl-ads.com. Too lazy to click on the superbowl-ads link? Just watch these top ten from last year that someone already put on the web. They’re not all good, but they’re apparently the best…


What do you think? Please don’t tell us you look forward to the ads… Email us

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Saying really mean things with pretty photos

16 Jan
We’re really not mean-spirited guys over here at The Max. Calling us that would be a major misconception. But we do have a few things to say that aren’t so nice. So to soften the blow, we added some aesthetically pleasing photos, hence the extremely creative title of this post: Saying really mean things with pretty photos.
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Colbert joins club, rips Mets

16 Jan

In a recent edition of The Colbert Report, Steve Colbert joined in on the fun of destroying the Mets for their ridiculous new commemorative patch. In his rant, he also shows a screen grab from Yahoo! Sports where the site compares the logo to the Domino’s Pizza logo. Over the past week, it appears everybody is giving credit to Yahoo! for coming up with this (Not for nothing, but The Max posted the same exact thing 3 HOURS prior to Yahoo! Check it out).

Check out the time stamp. We posted at 12:50 p.m. Our first comment was at 2:08 p.m. They posted after 5 p.m. (seen here). Not that we are bitter or anything. We’re still big fans of Yahoo’s Big League Stew, and always will be. We would just like a reply to the email we sent to them. That’s all (the e-mail was very friendly, by the way).

Oh yeah, the video. Here’s it is:

.cc_box a:hover .cc_home{background:url(‘http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/video/assets/syndicated-logo-over.png’) !important;}.cc_links a{color:#b9b9b9;text-decoration:none;}.cc_show a{color:#707070;text-decoration:none;}.cc_title a{color:#868686;text-decoration:none;}.cc_links a:hover{color:#67bee2;text-decoration:underline;}

The Colbert ReportMon – Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Tip/Wag – Monkey on the Lam

http://media.mtvnservices.com/mgid:cms:item:comedycentral.com:215975

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New show from YES

16 Jan

Hey loyal reader(s) of The Max, the YES web guy has asked us to post this pilot episode of a new show they will be debuting shortly. The goal, I suppose, is to solicit as much feedback on the show as possible before launching it on YESNetwork.com. You know the routine, watch the show, then comment below.

 

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Please stop talking, Reggie Miller

15 Jan

reggie.jpg Not that The Max would ever misunderestimate Barack Obama’s talents on anything, but when Reggie Miller recently told CNN he believes Obama’s basketball skills may offer clues to his style of leadership, we had to slap Miller with a technical.

C’mon Reg, seriously? Someone here at The Max had a roommate in college who was a a local legend when it came to playing Madden football on the PlayStation 2, but that didn’t mean the couch potato was capable of leading the University’s football team to victory in the NCAA title game. (Another Max reporter’s ex-roommate was also a pro at Grand Theft Auto, yet he never hot-wired a car in his life. Go figure.)

Miller also said he wouldn’t mind “picking [Obama] up on my squad” in a pickup game.

Well, that we agree with. The general rule of thumb is as follows: If the most powerful guy in the land wants to play, you put him on your team, and you let him shoot from halfcourt if he wants to. Even if Obama said he planned to shoot with his feet and dribble with his elbows, you still put him in your starting five.

But Miller had more to say: “[Obama] makes sure that everyone gets involved, and that’s the kind of point guard I want. Those are guys like Magic Johnson, Mark Jackson, John Stockton, it’s not all about them; it’s about let’s
make sure our team is good. He’s going to get the ball to everyone.”

Whoa boy. We get that Miller is trying to relate Obama to some greats people will know, but even mentioning Obama’s b-ball skills in the same sentence as Magic or Stockton is like saying the goalie in this video has a shot at making varsity.

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